Friday, March 07, 2008
what the...
Happy weekend...
Thursday, March 06, 2008
eight...
I know it's only a matter of time before he stops telling me he loves me every time he gets out of the van to get on the bus, or letting me kiss the top of his head in front of other kids at school, or climbing up to snuggle in my lap. He hardly fits in my lap, but he still wants to try it from time to time. I feel like the next time I blink, all of that will be gone and he'll be a cranky teenager who slams his door in my face when I tell him he can't go somewhere or do something.
In the meantime. I cherish the fact that he still tells me he loves me every day before bed, and still wants birthday cake for breakfast.
Happy Birthday little man. Hope all your wishes come true!
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
rock the vote...
Friday, February 29, 2008
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
janet is amazing and fabulous once again...
In other news, I tried a new class at the uber-fabulous gym today. Spinning. In the name of all that is holy, do not attempt this class without someone who knows what they are doing. If I had followed the instructor's cues instead of listening to my mother who was 'spinning' along beside me, I would not be walking upright. She kept telling me not to up my resistance every time the guy told us to do it. I consider myself fairly in shape and that class KICKED MY ASS. Literally. I believe my ass is bruised from the bike seat. And I barely raised my resistance. I will feel like I can conquer the world when I can make it through that class and actually follow the resistance cues and remain standing the whole time I'm supposed to. Today I was seriously afraid to get off of the bike when it was over because I was certain my legs (which felt like wet jello) would give way and I'd fall on my face in front of all of those in shape people. I did NOT fall on my face in case you were wondering. But walking down the steps to the locker room was a serious challenge.
But on a bright note, I did not fart. I could have and totally gotten away with it because it isn't quiet like pilates class, but I didn't. I know you're all so proud!
Friday, February 22, 2008
it's friday...
Enjoy..
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
gym nirvana...
Anyway...our year long commitment with them was coming to a close and I was trying to decide whether I was going to continue to give them my money in hopes that they would somehow, someday have enough to begin renovation and, oh I don't know, start by adding a locker room. Did I mention it was a dump? Then last week my mom mentioned that the uber-fabulous gym she belongs to was running a special where she could add me to her existing membership for only $29 a month. I was wary because I knew it was too good to be true. Except it was true. I joined last weekend and ventured in today for my first workout.
To call it uber-fabulous does not do it justice. They have a cardio cinema. Seriously. An actual movie theater filled with cardio equipment. I worked out for over an hour today on an elliptical machine while watching Ocean's 11. Brad Pitt & George Clooney make you forget that your thighs are burning because you're on an ellitical machine. Because, you know, they make my thighs burn just with their mere presence. And the cardio cinema is only ONE of the 9 million amenities that are now mine to enjoy. One of my favorite things about it is the kid's playroom. It has a climbing gym inside of it. Like McDonalds- only clean. The walls are lined with cool toys and books and paper and crayons and and and....it is perfection :)
It is so wonderful that I keep waiting for someone to walk up to me and say "I'm sorry, maam. There was mix up and you have to go back to the dump you were formerly a member of. Buh-bye" If they do you'll hear my cries of despair from miles away.
Friday, February 15, 2008
if you don't think this is funny...
Monday, February 11, 2008
ain't no other man...
1. He and I don't see eye to eye on music. AT ALL. And yet he rarely whines about having to drive in the car with me listening to country music. Even though it sometimes makes his ears bleed.
2. He can fall asleep in under 5 seconds if he is sitting down.
3. We can carry on an entire conversation around him as he sleeps, with no response until we make fun of him. He always gets us with an "I heard that"
4. He loves giving our kids a bath. I hate it. Enough said.
5. He knows random trivia about everything. He rocks at Trivial Pursuit.
6. Also, he can make Jeopardy! entertaining.
7. He taught my 18 year old brother & his girlfriend that you can't read a fortune cookie without putting "in bed" at the end of the fortune. You have to know my brother to understand why that is so damn funny.
8. He can watch ESPN all day long. Wait, I hate that about him.
9. When he walks into a room and I am watching Sweet Home Alabama for what has to be the 875th time, he might just sit down and watch it with me.
10. Only 10? This is going to take forever! He can listen to me bitch about my mother without ever reminding me that I am JUST LIKE HER.
11. That thing he does when he lifts the lid of every container and says the same stupid phrase to whatever food is inside.
12. That he can't play a video game of ANY KIND without using his tongue.
13. He thinks he's a good dancer.
14. He dances in public.
15. He requires a hug every day when he gets home. Requires it.
16. He also still likes to hold my hand in public. Awwwww....
17. He doesn't roll his eyes at my ignorant ideas. Well almost never.
18. He helps with the massive quantity of dogs at my parent's house. Most husbands would give you a "hell no". He does it, and does it well.
19. He lets me hog the bed AND the covers.
20. He scratches my back whenever I ask.
21. I have used 'The Promise' on him more times than I care to admit and it still works. I guess he always can hope?
22. He gets up first almost every morning and gets the house running so I can have a few minutes extra sleep. Back off girls. He's mine. You can't have him.
23. He never says "spaghetti again?"
24. He goes to the store for me. At 11:30 pm when I remember we have no milk for tomorrow morning.
25. If I am craving wings at 10 pm he can also be persuaded to get them for me. See #21.
26. Yes. He spoils me. It's one of the things I love :)
27. 2006 Valentine's Day gift. It was one for the husband of the year record books. I wish I had blogged it so that I could share it now, but it was gooood.
28. He accepts my family. No really.
29. He thinks his mom likes me.
30. He tries to be open-minded everytime I decide on the spur of the moment to paint/rearrange/redecorate any given room in our house.
31. He lets me think I'm right. Even when I know I'm wrong and don't want to admit it.
32. He has not one time looked at my pile o' scrapbooking equipment and said "seriously? What else could you possibly need?"
33. Same goes for shoes.
34. He understands my need for 20 minutes of alone time at night and usually wrangles the kids so I can have it.
35. He has never given me shit for telling him before we were married that I needed a clause written into the contract. 'If and when Tom Cruise came to sweep me off my feet, our marriage contract was null and void'. Seriously, Amy? Tom Cruise? I was so young and naive. **I** give **myself** shit about it, he never has.
36. He still needs me to match his pants/shirt/shoes at least 3 times a week.
and one to grow on....
*****He is the world's greatest husband/daddy/person that I know and I am so glad I got talked into dating him.
If there are 57 heinous spelling errors in this post, it's blgger's fault. The spell check isn't working :)
life on the tundra- day 11,510 give or take....
I shouldn't complain outloud since a couple of my loyal readers reside in Minnesota where the term "freeze your ass off" doesn't begin to describe the tundra they are currently in. However, I'm in my own frozen wasteland, so bitch away I will. It is COLD. DAMN COLD. It seems like we always hit this run of freeze in February. Where it's so freakin' cold you think you might just succumb to hyperthermia before spring rears it's glorious head. I haven't succumbed yet. But I do bitch about it. Because have I mentioned it's coooold?
In other news, the chiclets are all fighting off a dread virus. Because they love me best, they decided to share it with me. Awwww.. thanks guys! So sweet! The snot here in this house is copious. And we all know how fun it is when the snot in your nose freezes because it's so DAMN COLD OUTSIDE? Oh, the joys of winter!
Friday, February 08, 2008
friday funnies...
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
jammie day...
Today Ryan is giving me a little of my rainy day wish. He is sick, so he stayed home from school. His only request besides pancakes, was that we stay in our jammies and watch movies. Never one to deny a sick child, we are making our movie list for the day :) I doubt I'll get to watch chic flicks, but if I'm lucky his entire list won't be comprised of Star Wars episodes and Hot Wheels movies.
Friday, February 01, 2008
let the music continue....
This one is posted for your listening pleasure because it's FEBRUARY! The month of LOOOOOOOOOVE.....
While this isn't our official "song", or maybe it is??? Matt??? Is this our song??? Whatever, I can't even hear the opening notes of this song without being immediately transported back to the summer of '94. Steamy summer nights in the frat house.....
Thursday, January 31, 2008
jen's on vacation....
This one is chosen because I cannot believe in is the end of January already. I just started to write 2008 on things without having to think 4 times about what year it really is. And already the first month of '08 is outta here! Just this past weekend, I heard the parent of a teenager lament on how fast it has all really gone for her, and how when her kids were younger she rolled her eyes when people told her to enjoy every day because it would go by so fast. Admit it- who hasn't done the same? Because when you're in the middle of chasing three kids all running in opposite directions at the park in 90 degree, humid weather, the toddler years can't go by fast enough sometimes. But already, my oldest is nearing 8 and I can't believe how fast his life has rushed by me.
So just remember...don't blink.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
that's not MY dog...
ANYWAY... yesterday it was someone else's turn to take over star of the week position so Ry's teacher handed me back his poster. She stopped me as I turned to leave and said "Are those really your dogs?" I did a double (perhaps triple) take and said "uhhh, yes?? Why do you ask?" She said that Ryan had a chance to talk about all of the stuff on the poster and when she pointed to Shasta and Baxter he had not one clue who they were. I looked at my son like he was an alien and said, "Ryan...you know who these dogs are! Who is this?"(pointing to Shasta) He then looked at me like I was an alien- can't you just feel the love in our family- and said "I don't KNOW mom!" I told him he was silly because of course it was Shasta! He again rolled his eyes at his alien of a mother and said "No mom, Shasta has a white beard. This dog has a black one. You picked the wrong dog."
How to explain the aging dog to a 3 yr old? Poor Shasta and Baxter are apparently unrecognizable in their younger years to their own chiclets. I admit Baxter doesn't look a BIT like he did 8 yrs ago, but Shasta...I didn't think she had changed much. I guess she has.
In the end we all got a good laugh about the fact that it was the first time this year that a kid didn't recognize a pet on his own poster. Ryan gets to keep his one of a kind status :)
In her defense, Shasta has earned every single white in her 'beard'. She has the patience of a saint-dog. And 3 chiclets that make her earn her white the honest way.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
just a grain of sand...
I have some people in my life who are dealing with various struggles. Some bad, some worse, all of them stressful and weighing them down. These are people who normally are a ray of sunshine in my life. They deserve a big fat ray of sunshine in their lives right now. I'm praying for answers to their problems, and for their burdens to be lifted, but in the meantime, this song spoke to me today, because so many times in our life we struggle with what appears to be a mountain and in retrospect, it's only a grain of sand. I hope their mountains melt to sand soon. And that the sun shines into their world again soon.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
overheard today...
Hannah: you can't marry Padme, Ryan she's already married to Anakin
(these are characters from Star Wars for those of you that are uninformed or not the parents of kids who watch these movies endlessly)
Ryan: Oh. OK. I marry Princess Leia.
(also Star Wars. Although if you don't know who she is, what exactly were you DOING in the late 70s early 80s anyway??)
Hannah: *sighing* No Ryan. She is in love with Han Solo.
Ryan: *pouts a moment* I just marry Hermione.
(Hermione Granger. Harry Potter.)
Hannah: You can't marry HER Ryan! She's not real!
At this point I am losing it down the hall, because seriously? How is Hermione is less real than Queen Padme Amidala? Or Princess Leia? At least Hermione is contemporary. Ryan has my blessing. It might be sort of cool to have a smart witch in the family. I didn't want to ruin the end of the 7th Harry Potter book for them and tell them why he couldn't technically marry her either :)
Monday, January 14, 2008
imperfect and loving it...
I walked away feeling sorry for her kids and her husband. He is a really nice guy and I feel bad that he has to stand there and listen to her spout blah-bitty-blah-blah-blah every time they run into someone. She tells the same stories every time I see her, so I know he has to listen to them A LOT. I feel for her kids because they have to feel like they have to stand up to the perfect dream she has woven into their lives. How do you make a mistake in that house and live to tell? I know mistakes have to be made, they're just covered up and woven into some grand fairy tale making them seem like they weren't mistakes at all.
Lucky for my kids. The stories I tell are about them clogging my toilets, beating each other up, and basically acting like the normal, goober kids that they are. No high standards to live up to in this house :)
Friday, January 11, 2008
the pig lives to tell...
We also now have our hands on a new gameboy DS. Thanks to the lovely Marsha for the lovely e bay links. We thought we had one ordered online only to find out 3 days later that it was backordered. There was much hate spewing about that day. But the lovely Marsha had taken time to dig up a few on e bay and we ended up buying one of those. The lovely e bayer who the lovely Marsha found, sent it so fast my head was spinning. Now I have a happy 7 yr old. And I can stop calling Target, Meijer, Best Buy, Circuit City, and Gamestop every day. Now I can get back to cleaning toilets.
Have a lovely weekend :) We have a whole lot of nada going on which is just what I need!
Monday, January 07, 2008
anyone? anyone??
Friday, January 04, 2008
nintendo, why do you not ship enough product?
The people at Nintendo have been on my personal shitlist since the first time Justin's gameboy broke and they charged an outrageous $75 to fix an game that only cost $120 to begin with. I thought that was the charge because he had broken the screen. Nope. This time something minor is broken and I find out that $75 is the STANDARD repair charge. So now they want me to pay a second $75 charge. Meaning, if I've done my math correctly, I've paid more for it to be repaired than I paid for it initially. How's that for a side dish of ironic? One of the things on Justin's wish list to Santa was "something to fix my broken DS" Awww...pull at mama's heartstrings. So we decided to just get a new one. Only it was a week before Christmas and we didn't have the spare budget to fork out the cash for it right then. Santa left Justin a new charger for his old Gameboy SP (his mysteriously has disappeared several times) and a note telling him he had taken the DS to the workshop to see if the elves could fix it and that he'd send it back in a week or 2 (coincidentally pay day time) and that hopefully he could charge up the old SP and that would keep him happy in the meantime.
So...fast forward to today. Payday!! I'm going to buzz over to Target and get a nice latte and a new DS. Only they're out of stock. So I take my delicious latte, hop back in the van and go next door to Meijer. Nope out of stock. Only a little deterred, I sip my latte on the way to WalMart. Again, denied. I then think to try GameStop. Which is when I got made fun of and began to think there maybe, just maybe, would be a little problem getting my hands on a DS today. Or any day soon. I came home and began making phone calls. People, they are sold out everywhere within a 30 mile radius of my house. WTF? This is not the "in" toy this year. Why can't I find one? I finally found a WalMart 30 min from my house that had a few in stock. They wouldn't hold one for me so I jumped right skippy into my van and drove (minus the latte this time). When I got there a different pimple faced boy told me they had just sold the last one. He was lucky that I had to park really far away and it was too cold to walk to the van to retrieve the semi automatic. I was a smidge on the angry side.
So, Nintendo. I must ask you...why do you make fun toys that everyone wants, but not enough of them? Why do you mock me with shelves full of pink DS and nary a black, red, or white one in sight? Why?? WHY??
Thursday, January 03, 2008
true confessions...
I haven't exercised regularly in almost that long.
I have gained ___ pounds. I can't say it outloud. Don't try twisting my arm. I won't say it.
I did 45 min on the the elliptical today and it about killed me.
But it didn't.
My ass is SO back on the wagon even though it's so big it barely fits up here.
Holidays are a bitch on my waistline.
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
buh-bye 2007...
There was a little bad here and there thrown in, but if it was all good people would start questioning my vodka/tequila consumption.
When asked for my resolutions I snort. No, seriously. I literally snort. I don't DO resolutions. I suck at them. I want to get back on track with my weight loss but that has less to do with a new year than it does with the holidays being over and me being less likely to encounter trays of cookies at every destination. I guess if pushed I would say that I resolve to start running this year. I want to run the 5k that I usually walk in the Race For The Cure this summer. However I have been saying for 2 years now that I am going to do that, so is this THE year? I dunno. Maybe. No really, trust me. I suck at resolutions. I could resolve to say NO more often, but puh-lease. Who would I be if not everyone's 'yes girl'? It is not a resolution I can even say with a straight face. So I guess I resolve to make no resolutions and just try to keep laughing at myself and those who I love and hold dear. Sounds good for 2008. Cheers!
Monday, December 31, 2007
sick and twisted are we...
Friday, December 28, 2007
christmas mission statement...
I love my parents and sibs to pieces. I know that we don't see eye to eye on a lot of things. I think that's pretty normal. I just have to let a lot of stuff go. Stuff that has been clouding my vision of who I am for too many years now. How I am going to do it is a mystery to me, but I gotta do it.
There...wasn't that fun? I sort of feel like Tom Cruise in Jerry McGuire. I'll just bag up my fish and go now.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
your holiday laugh...
Monday, December 17, 2007
do you hear them calling???
But damn...cover a pretzel in chocolate and drizzle it with toffee chips. A word of warning: it might just become your new best friend. Consider yourself warned :)
Thursday, December 13, 2007
send me the therapy bills...
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
bitter is the soup of the day...
Saturday, December 08, 2007
the curse of the cosmo...
1. Just because top shelf alcohol is being offered free of charge, you don't have to drink it. All.
2. A Cosmo is really nothing more than a giant vodka with a splash of cranberry juice.
3. 4 Cosmos? Not a good idea.
4. The porcelain gods are still not good to me.
5. I don't know how I survived college.
Because....I didn't crawl out of bed until 11 am today. Well unless you count the 5 times I ran to puke my guts out. I will NEVER touch a Cosmo again and just the thought of cranberry juice makes me queasy today.
But P.S... I looked really cute last night. I think. I don't really remember much.
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
this makes me want a do-over on our 1st dance...
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
how could you???
I am just at the trust point with my new hair dude (this is my first hair 'dude' and I ADORE him) where I was going to go in and say to him "Drew, if you could do anything you wanted to with my head, what would it be?" and then I was going to LET HIM DO IT. I called to schedule an appointment this week before Matt's company Christmas party and **GASP** Drew is no longer with us. WHAT??!!?? Where has he gone? Why didn't he call me? How could he? Apparently he wasn't allowed to call me and tell me. I am in mourning over this. I now have to turn my head over to a complete stranger the day before the party and hope I don't come away looking like Dudley Moore. Or go to the party with a festive scrunchie. Neither is an alternative that makes me happy.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
things i managed to accomplish today...
2. telling her again.
3. and then one more time because 2 solid NOs are never, ever enough for my mama.
4. ordered my Christmas cards
5. re-ordered family pics because I grossly underestimated their cuteness.
6. tackled laundry- actually washed, dried, and put away most of it. Most of it.
7. looked at cowboy ass.
8. wished I was born in OOOOOOklahoma (where the winds come sweeping down the plains) (and there are cowboys aplenty)
9. took picture retake money to my first born at school.
10. could not curse first born for forgetting to take it with him today, since the reason he needed retakes on said pictures is because his ever-lovin' mama forgot to put his picture envelope in his backpack the first time around.
11. ****sigh**** cowboys. Just once more. Or twice. But not a third time. Well maybe a third. Or fourth. But that's all!!
12. stripped the sheets on the girl child's bed. Hoping this helps kill the flu bug that is following her around these days.
13. noticed grimy toilets.
14. did nothing but ignore them and put them off for another day.
Can you say excitement? I know my life lacks passion on most days. Not today, though! Did I mention the cowboys??
Monday, November 26, 2007
bringing crazy back...
I got a little Christmas shopping done on Sat (the one day that no one had a fever or ookie stomach) but when I got home and looked at the loot it became all too clear how much I actually have left to do. This week the calendar flips to DECEMBER. Can I get a YIKES??
I also came to the realization this weekend that there are some people who you cannot possibly make happy. And also those same people will never like you the way you want them to. This was a hard realization for me because I am one of those personalities that craves for everyone to like me. Oh well. I just have to live with it. Or at least try to. And now I can relax. Instead of always being on guard and not acting like...well...acting like me. I'm just going to be myself because what difference does it make at this point? I've tried every other possible me-ness and none of my fun personalities has been pleasing to said people/person.
Family time can be oh-so fun.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
go with a smile and wear armor...
I had so many people who rolled their eyes and huffed away because I had the AUDACITY to forget my x-ray glasses so that I could see them coming as I came out of an aisle. It wasn't like I pushed on ahead. I stopped, let them cross, smiled and said "OOPS! Sorry." When a cranky old lady rolled her eyes at me, I added on a "Happy Holidays!" just because I knew it would piss her off. Cause I'm sweet like that.
This is why I'd rather be strung up by my toenails than shop the day after Thanksgiving. There are just some nasty, crabby people in this world. Not even a full-fat gingerbread latte can make shopping with hordes of cranky and greedy Grinches do-able.
Monday, November 19, 2007
no good title for this one...
After everything was over and everyone had gone home, Marsha, me, and our good friend Elizabeth sat around with a fabulous BOX of wine. We drank and talked and laughed and cried. It was therapeutic for me and I hope it helped Marsha in some way. My heart is broken for her, but I know God will bless her with a child someday. She is destined to be the world's greatest mommy. I have known that to be a fact during the entire 15 years that I have known her.
I know the next days, weeks, months, are going to be the worst for Marsha and family. I hope if she pops on here and finds this post she knows I love her and I am sending her hugs in my head all day, every day.
I am ever so thankful that I was able to come home and hug the pieces out of my 3 chiclets. You sometimes forget how blessed you are in the day to day nose wipings, butt wipings, battle breaking-ups, etc. Marissa now reminds me daily how very blessed I am and I thank her for it. And also we have photographic proof that she was pissed off at the Buckeyes for losing to Illinois. She really was a cool kid. Even if it was for a brief time.
We love you and miss you sweet Marissa.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
clark griswold revisited...
It was also once again a day where I could sit back and watch the psychotic parents wanting THEIR cars to finish first. The kids of said parents were running around the gym not watching or even caring about their cars. The dads watched with intensity, critiquing the way the cars ran on the 2 different tracks. It was, quite frankly, obnoxious. I guess for some people this is the highlight of their year. Building a car for their child and watching it run, hoping their kid scores a trophy on a car they didn't spend 1/2 a minute working on or even thinking about.
Matt & Justin plan to get reinforcements next year. He's hoping for the car the rivals Clark Griswold's experimentally lubed up sled in Christmas Vacation. The type of car the zips off the track, and runs clean through the bleachers, lockers, and few classrooms, and into the cafeteria down the hall. I fear Matt will be the freakish dad watching the cars run down the tracks and sweating over a dorky trophy.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
pinewood derby....
One other thing he did? He glued the axles in. The wheels fell off after the race last year, so he figured a little glue would do the trick. A little glue would've been perfect. He used gorilla glue. It expands. Are you starting to form a picture of what happens when you put expanding glue on an axle, really close to a wheel? Yep..he pretty much glued the wheels to the axle. Oh yeah...that baby is going to fly down the ramp. Or maybe it'll just sit there at the top because the wheels are unable to turn. And of course everything gets done at the 11th hour in this house so Matt was pulling off the wheels and trying to drill the glue off 15 minutes before weigh in time. Never a dull moment. It's an entertaining looking car anyway. It's painted shiny bright gold. Justin picked shark stickers. The stickers that also had the cool "Silver Shark" label for the hood. So his shiny gold car is called the Silver Shark. Keep 'em guessing. That's our motto.
Race results will be posted tomorrow.
Friday, November 09, 2007
take it back....
What I got? Oh... a teacher that has pegged my son as a problem child. He's a pain in the ass, but not a trouble-maker by any stretch of my (or anyone else's) imagination. I also got a girl child screaming in the middle of the night about her painful (and now goopy and pink) eye. Thanks to the gods of pink eye, our home is infested with whatever creepy-crawly germs cause the dreaded pink eye. **cringe** **hork**
So to whomever I provoked with my former statement "bring it on", I beg of you to TAKE IT BACK!! And next time you bring it on?? Bring more wine. I really needed it to survive this pissy week. Thanks in advance.
Thursday, November 08, 2007
bring it on...
You know how it is when you clean like a crazy woman and then you turn a corner and realize your house is STILL A COMPLETE PIGSTY? Yeah, that pretty much sums it up. Oh and, add to that, pink eye. In both my child and the teenage girl who was supposed to babysit tonight during the 8:40 **PM** conference that I must attend with my girl child's teacher. I believe the 2 instances of pink eye to be unrelated but each puts a special and significant kink in my week. Add to THAT the normal day to day splitting up arguments between children who are never, ever wrong, finding socks that were taken off in 2 different rooms (and we wonder why there are no matches) trying desperately to find mittens and gloves that match because this week Mother Nature decided to turn all winter and shit on us, and let's not forget that 8:40 **PM** conference. I was told to list my 3 choices. I listed 2 times around **6** pm and one time that was in the middle of the day tomorrow. Somehow out of those 3 choices, I was given the obvious one. The one that is the last conference of the day. The day where the teacher has been in conferences since 11 **AM**. Oh, yeah. That's going to be an effective conference.
But I don't like to whine. Really, I don't.
Sunday, November 04, 2007
my husband is a genius...
If you wanted to buy me a Christmas present, you could look here, or anywhere here.
You want my favorite cookie recipe? Right here it is. Although I personally delete the walnuts. I also found using Heath chips is a fabulous substitution for chocolate chips. You're welcome. What about my nightmare? Right here it is. Wanna see the cool artist I found at a craft show yesterday? Here she is!
How fun is this???? If I had asked him a thousand years ago I could have done this way back then. He gave me the "duh...you don't know how to do that?" look when I asked him about it. Whatever, I never claimed to be a computer geek :)
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
step away from the seeds...
it is of course the BLATANT waste and misuse of pumpkin seeds. I have an addiction that only gets fed at the end of October every year. And don't EVEN tell me to try to ones in the grocery store. Not even close.
Happy Halloween!!
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
color my world...
Click on the link at the bottom and try it your ownself!
#DA70D6 |
Your dominant hues are red and blue. You're confident and like showing people new ideas. You play well with others and can be very influential if you want to be. Your saturation level is lower than average - You don't stress out over things and don't understand people who do. Finishing projects may sometimes be a challenge, but you schedule time as you see fit and the important things all happen in the end, even if not everyone sees your grand master plan. Your outlook on life is bright. You see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything. |
Monday, October 29, 2007
i no speaka you language...
I know it sort of sounds a lot like new-age bullshit at first but just think about it.
What are you? What is your husband? Your kids? This is from my notes so it is probably explained better elsewhere. I was told that there is a book on these called Love Languages.
- acts of service (doing good deeds for others)
- words of encouragement
- gift giving
- quality time
- physical touch and closeness- not necessarily sexual.
Just some food for thought :)
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
new look...
How exciting!!!
Back to your regularly scheduled lives.
Oh and **JEN** listen up...
NO CHASING DOGS. SIT DOWN. OR ELSE.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
making a dent...
Anyway, back to my neighbor. I explained to her that we got into the habit and now it's second-nature for us. I also told her she'd be shocked at how much room it saves in the trash bags. The 4-5 gallons of milk we drink a week take up a lot of space in the trash bags, but crunch down nicely in the recycling bins. She just laughed and said it seems silly. Like my little pile of recyclables are going to make a dent in the overall trash consumption. I was, at that point, almost cross-eyed over her logic but figured there are some people you just can't figure out. Of the 30+ people on our street, we are one of 4 families that recycles. It's sort of sad. We are now the oddballs. Well...in some ways we always have been :) My neighbor asked if we got some kind of discount on our garbage bill because we recycle. Figuring, I guess, that there could be no other reason to do such an ignorant thing. I told her that no, we do not get a discount, but 30 years from now when we are tripping over pop (soda, whatever) cans in the city parks, I'll feel better knowing it isn't MY PERSONAL pop (soda, whatever) can. Mine all got recycled.
Monday, October 22, 2007
fun with global warming....
It will probably be snowing next week for trick-or-treat. And we'll be questioning whether the globe actually is getting warmer or if it's just a big cosmic joke. Welcome to the Midwest.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
the girl child turns six...
Friday, October 05, 2007
who screwed up my calendar....
I sat last weekend thinking I had all the time in the world to get Hannah's birthday invites together and then it hit me like a Mack truck that her birthday is a mere 2 weeks away and the invite clock was already ticking. I had to get those suckers in the mail and wait by the phone for RSVPs to start rolling in. Ha. Not that anyone will RSVP. No one does. Not even sure why I put it on the invite. Just for giggles I guess. But really, it turned into October before I was ready for September to be complete. And from previous experience I know that it will be Halloween in approximately 5 minutes, 10 minutes later it is Thanksgiving, then about 2 minutes after that it's Christmas. CHRISTMAS.
Plugging ears, running around in circles, lalalalalalalalaididn'thearthatlalalalalalala.....
Monday, September 24, 2007
me, me, pick me, i can do it!
The third-fourth weeks of school must be the week that the teachers think we have weeded through all of the paperwork they threw at us the first 2 weeks, and so they can begin asking us for spare time.
I volunteered. And I volunteered. And I volunteered. And then because I was bored, I volunteered some more.
I am now doing about 6 jobs for Justin's school PTO throughout the year, volunteering in Hannah's class bi-weekly, am serving on the board for the preschool, am also the assistant/question answerer during the Monday night dance classes. This is a sampling. There's more. We've previously discussed my lack of ability in the saying "no" department. I obviously lack a time management skill somewhere also. I think I have a problem with sitting still. ADHD anyone? If I am continuously volunteering for something, I'm never just sitting on my hands with nothing to do. Sadly, at least once a week I am spinning in circles trying to figure out how I am going to get it all done. And then my head explodes and I have that to clean that mess up. But, boredom? No, not dealing with that much these days.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
all in the name...
1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car), John Wayne Uplander- sounds all cool Bon Jovi, yes?
2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie), Coffee Oatmeal Chocolate Chip. It's all good, yo. That's how I roll
3. YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name), A-MOH Hmmm... I gots to think on that one.
4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal), Lavender Manatee. That one is going to make it into the next Stephanie Plum story line. I just KNOW it!
5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born), Joy Columbus. Not one you'll be seeing on Days Of Our Lives anytime soon methinks
6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first), Moham. I believe that makes me one of the desert sand dwellers that wears a hood??
7. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink), The Lime Green Margarita. Oh yes...she's my hero.
8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers), Robert Jack. But I think he'd be Bobby Jack in the Nascar world.
9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy), Chance Kit Kat. This would also double as my porn star name I do believe.
10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names ), Joy Lynn. You didn't see me here....
11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter), Hood Houston. Wasn't he in the Anchorman movie? I'm sure he was Vince Vaughn's character's weatherman.
12. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower). Autumn Lilac. Oh yeah...great spy name. It's Lilac, Autumn Lilac. I'll have my margarita on the rocks. Shaken, but not so hard that the ice melts.
13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”) Apple Pantsie. I think she was in the collection of recalled Chinese made Mattel dolls.
14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree), Nothing Buckeye. Groovy man, totally groovy.
15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”), The Scrapping Rain Tour. Makes me want to go stand in line for tickets right now. This one is SURE to sell out quick-like.
Monday, September 17, 2007
holy filth, batman...
Here's a small sampling of what I found:
3 empty french fry bags.
2 empty Happy Meal bags
186 (only a small exaggeration) Happy Meal toys
12 french fries
4 chicken nuggets in various states of decomposition (that's for you Jen)
1 realization that we eat too much McDonald's
8 stuffed animals
3 bags to carry stuffed animals to the van and then leave them there
4 water bottles
5 clean pairs of socks (??? do we keep them in the van???))
2 dirty pairs of socks
3 pairs of Ryan's underwear (clean thankyouverymuch)
9 broken crayons
6098 hot wheels
9 million Pokemon cards
8 books
2 empty DVD boxes
5 empty M&M bags- all next to Hannah's seat- can you say chocoholic?
12 pony tail holders- no wonder I can never find them in the house.
enough loose change to make a dent in the national debt-but curiously not our own debt.
And that's just a sample. It was seriously trashed. It's amazing how stuff can pile up. I generally let Hannah have the back row of seats to herself because she's somewhat of a slob and I hate for the boys to have to clear a space to sit down every time among her stuffed animal collection and M&M wrappers. So I tend to let the back row get pretty bad before I notice something has to be done. I think I may have let it go a smidge too long this time :)
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
only me...
I don't know if I'll ever be able to show my face in the Wed class again, but I'm going to work on controlling sphincter as well as core muscles while doing the rollover at home until next week.
Friday, September 07, 2007
live vicariously through me...at your own risk...
I'm allowing him to live because it will now and forever be his job to clean his fish tank. Ceramic shark and all.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
and then there were none...

Now he's all light sabers, catching crickets bare-handed, picking boogers, farting bubbles in the bathtub, mouthing off, and this...
At the risk of sounding like a 90 year old granny, where has the time gone???
Sunday, September 02, 2007
kindergarten, baby...
Anyway...back to Hannah...
I offer a pictorial of her bus stop experience...
Before leaving the house... pose...Ms. Diva First-Day-of-School-Girl
At the bus stop...telling all of the other kids to BACK OFF, because this is my 'get on the bus moment' and didn't anyone tell you to get in a line and wait your turn? I already know how to do EVERYTHING the right way, because I already know how to do EVERYTHING. I probably don't even NEED to go to school today because, really, what can they teach me that I don't ALREADY KNOW??...
On the bus...pose again...did you get that shot mom? Bus driver do NOT roll your eyes at me. I need this documented in my scrapbook.
I had another shot of the bus pulling away but blogger won't let me upload more than 3 pictures and really there is no way to illustrate the silence that surrounded us all when my sweet little know-it-all got on the bus finally and the driver closed the door. I won't lie. I was a little misty eyed. Which is more than I thought I would be. I was worried I would look like the only heart-less, cold parent standing at the bus stop not boo-hooing over my child heading off to kindergarten. I love Hannah, but you know how silence is golden at the movie theaters? It's platinum at this house. And because Hannah likes to see how many words she can squeeze into every day, there is not much platinum around here. Now there are 3 solid hours of platinum every weekday morning. Ryan doesn't quite have the need to fill every moment with words the way his sister does.
Next up...Ryan first day of school pictures and then it will back to posts filled with toilet cleaning stories and musings on my love of swiffer.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
it's all good....
Monday, August 20, 2007
a year of nonsense...
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
trading spaces challenged.....
Just add it to the list of reasons why I can't look them in the face anymore when they come and visit their friends in the old 'hood. I wave and quickly walk in the house to avoid eye contact. I fear should I ever be forced to speak to either of the former owners, I'll start spewing venom. In reality I just want to tell her that she is neither Hildi, Doug, Or Laurie, and that Frank would cry if he could see what she's done to the walls of this house. Because the next walls I will tackle involve CRACKLE FINISH. Seriously. It's on the walls. Isn't crackle finish for furniture only? Or is that just what I've heard? I think I want to invite Frank over just so I can see him roll his eyes. And then he can personally tell her that she should child lock TLC on her cable box.
*Not her real name. I wanted to protect her true identity so that the 3 people who read this blog don't know the asshat's real name.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
so this is normal...
Thursday, August 09, 2007
at least she's honest...
Anyway, as they were coming through the door I told Hannah that whichever portion of the house that they should choose to destroy today, she should keep somewhere in the forefront of her brain that it would have to be cleaned up when they were done. She looked at her little friend and asked if she would help her clean it up and her friend looked right at her and said no. And then walked upstairs.
All I can say to Hannah is, "don't say she didn't warn you"
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
christmas in august...
There was more grumbling. But 1/2 hr later she staggered up the stairs (she's all about the drama) and said I could look. I did my inspection and gave her a few more things to do before it was done. She finished those things and then to my surprise came up the stairs smiling and PROUD of herself for getting it done. Then she went off to tackle her bedroom. She also managed to get it presentable again. Without turning on the tears for full-effect again. I was astounded. It worked. With a little screaming (from me and her) and a little perseverance, I got her to clean up after herself.
It's a Christmas miracle. God bless us, every one.
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
help me with this one...
My experience with my boys is similar, but decidedly different. They can trash a room in 5 minutes flat also, but if you ask them to pick it up, they will. Without the hormonal outbursts so common with their sister. I told her that she was responsible for basement clean up. I know that it won't get done without tears. I don't know how to fix this issue. Same with her room.
I have these apparent choices...
1. continue to clean it up. I then run the risk of ending up cleaning her nasty bedroom well into her teen years (example: my mother)
2. make her clean up her disaster. I then run the risk of having to listen to her screeching about the unfairness of life in general. At the top of her lungs. This is especially problematic because I also run the risk of the neighbors calling child services because she is OBVIOUSLY being abused.
3. take all of her toys away. I tried this and it NEVER WORKS. I just removed all of her Barbies a few weeks ago because I was tired of vacuuming their shoes and having to pick their little blonde selves up. When she found out I thought the screeching would ensue. Nope. She just shrugged her shoulders and played with something else. Yes, she is spoiled. Yes, she has too many toys.
4. Let her live in her own filth like a pig and hope she grows out of it. Close the door if we have guests.
Not sure which of these options is most viable. All have their own merits and all have obvious set backs as well.
Maybe I'll just sell her to the gypsies for a nickel.
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
not very blog-worthy...
More on the surgery... there is nothing more heart-wrenching than to watch your child be wheeled away for surgery. Any surgery. He was very, VERY loopy from the excellent drugs they gave him. Like his mama, excellent drugs=emotional train wreck. He was all dopey and grinning until the nurse came to wheel him off then he looked at me with these begging, watery eyes as if to say "don't let them take me away mama". It was all I could do not to dissolve into a puddle of mommy goo on the floor. In the end it was all OK, but yeeks, I hated that part.
Now, because my parents are plotting to drive me to the brink of insanity, tomorrow they leave for a dog show and I'll be stationed at their house until Sunday. Praying that this whole recovery thing continues as is. Although since MY WHOLE FAMILY won't be at the dog show, like they were in Florida, at least I'll have help.
