reason # 2,345,789 that i love target...

They sell shirts like this one...

because he is, afterall, a ladies man and now he can advertise it.

mind-numbing, soul-sucking, family-fun place....

That's what Magic Mountain's tag line should read. The place has 2 floors. One covered wall to wall in blinking lighted, token sucking games that offer up tickets to use towards the purchase of less than dollar store quality prizes. The other floor is a germ fest covered climbing gym. Complete with balls that small children with snotty noses suck on, then toss at other children. Sound like a birthday party place to you? Yeah, me too. Big time fun. And we PAID to have a party there with approximately 9.3 million other people today. It was almost more fun than I could handle. I think it actually was.
But, I didn't lose any of the children that were left in my capable hands, no one vomited, no one got hurt, and only Hannah cried. And let's face it, she always does so that really doesn't count. She didn't get enough tickets to win one of the lovely/sarcasm/ prizes. And all the kids had fun, which is what really counts. They lost to some teenagers in a game of laser tag by a little over 10,000 points and still came out laughing and smiling like they had won the gold medal in the Olympics. Justin was happy about every inch of his special day and I don't even think he noticed me twitching every time he picked up a germ crusted ball to wing at one of his friends. The fact that it was my own personal hell doesn't really matter as long as the kids had fun :)

just when i want to tender my resignation...

it was just one of those mornings. We have a lot of them, but everything seemed amplified to me today. I've had a week full of schedule this, now reschedule that, don't forget to turn this, this, and this in. Did you already pay for this? Do we need to pay this now or later? Did you bake the cupcakes, what about the cake? Where is the stuff for the goodie bags? You mean the bags aren't done? What about the bows, earrings, and hats for the dance class? Did you get the pictures ordered? Where is THAT order form??? It just goes on and on sometimes. Most of the time actually. I love my life, my kids, my husband...but there are days when I want to be handed a pink slip. I want to tear my hair out and scream at the top of my lungs "I QUIT!" But, alas, I have one of those jobs you can't quit. You can't quit and you can't have breaks either- potty or otherwise- because more often than not, your boss follows you into the bathroom and wants to help flush. Cause it's fun to watch. Like I said, it's been one of those days.
Then something happens that turns it around for me. No- I didn't get a raise today. In fact I don't even get a damn paycheck. Remind me to speak to management about that later! Today the turnaround was my sick little boy. He can't help that his continuous vomit streak for the last 2 days has been a constant source of worry for me. Both worry for him and worry that he might puke on my favorite chair next. The chair that I have wanted for 10 yrs and finally have. Puke wouldn't be easy to clean up in my chair. But, my little sick boy just climbed up into my lap and gave me a big hug. Then he looked up and smiled his crooked smile and said "my love you mama." Plain and simple. I think I'll hang onto my job for a while longer.
Who needs a paycheck?

the day I became a mama...

Justin turned seven today.

I can hardly believe that it's been seven years already since I endured my first (and easiest) round of labor and delivery.

Seven years since I held that little bundle of boy in my arms for the first time.

Seven years since we cleaned his little head off for the first time and realized he had fire-red hair.

Seven years since I had my very first mommy scare. They took him to the NICU to help him breathe and I learned what real fear is all about.

Seven years of skinned knees.

Seven years of "but why??"

Seven years of snuggles.

Seven years of standing in his doorway, staring at him sleeping for a few minutes every night.

Seven years of "WHAT was that noise?" "Why is the cat running away from you so fast?"

Seven years of countless proud mama moments.

Seven years of wondering what I did with myself before I had kids.


Thanks to go to Justin. For all seven years of being my first born chiclet. For being my learning curve and forgiving the countless mistakes in parenting. I couldn't have asked for a better red-headed monkey than you!

march thaw- the positive notes...

That's right. It's children playing outside. What's that noise I'm hearing? Oh, it's the sound of peace and quiet. IN MY HOUSE. Ahhhh....the joys of the thaw.

the march thaw...

while it is snowing blizzard style in many parts of the country, it is finally NOT doing that here. And I am grateful for the break. I know it'll be back before I can call it Spring, but after 2 or more solid weeks of PILES of snow everywhere, I can see my yard again. It even rained all day yesterday, so what was left of the snow is officially 100% gone. I love that I can see my yard, and yet it brings to mind my least favorite job. See...we have 3 dogs. During all of the snowy weeks we have had, it has been layers of snow, then ice, then snow, then ice... you get the picture? So for 2+ weeks now I haven't been able to clean up after my sweet doggies. At all. The March thaw means I can do it finally. I just trudged through the yard in my (ugly, but very washable thankyouverymuch) crocs to do the duty. And it was not pretty. I tried to do it one day last week, but the top layer on that particular day was ice. That is, ice on top of 8 or so inches of snow/ice mix. So it was as if I was ice skating in my backyard. I would skate for a few steps and then fall through. I gave up pretty fast. I love my dogs, but I seriously hate dog clean up in the winter. Now it is done and because I did it, I can demand a backrub tonight.
How's that for some fun reading for you? All about the clean up of dog shit. Hey! I never claimed it would always be interesting reading. At least I didn't post pictures. You're welcome.

better...not great... but better...

i feel marginally human again today. Marginally, in that I don't feel like I need to lay down and have a nap every time I am standing for more than 5 minutes. Good thing too, because Thurs = hell day in this house now. We have dance, gymnastics, and karate all on the same day. This from the mom who swore she'd never have her kids in more than 1 activity at a time. Just wait! In a mere few weeks baseball and soccer start up. Justin had to choose between the 2 and (of course because I HATE it) he chose baseball. Hannah wants to do soccer again. Hopefully Matt will have to coach Justin's baseball team so he'll be in charge of getting him there. Because, seriously, I despise baseball. I don't have concrete reasons for it, so don't bother asking. I can't help that of all the chiclet sports there are to choose from, I hates me some baseball the most. I think it stems mostly from the fact that there is no time limit on it. You can be at one little league baseball game for days, weeks even! Slight exaggeration, but really they go on, and on, and on, f-o-r-e-v-e-r. Give me a good 45 min. soccer game any day of the week.
So anyway...feeling better today. Cranky, but better. Only a few remaining swords in my throat. Still blaming Matt for that. I'm sure he did it.

virus...

as soon as you read this, hose your keyboard down with Lysol so you don't get my death-ish germs.
I've been hit by a truck. A big truck with big wheels. In it's wake I am a shell of my former self and am currently struggling to swallow even though I am certain Matt put little, tiny swords in my throat while I was sleeping. Why would he do such a thing? Does he enjoy seeing me barely able to lift my head? Apparently. I trudged through the shower and it made me feel well enough to turn on the computer. Now I have wasted reserve energy on typing and I must go lay down and swallow swords again while the children tear the house apart.
Enjoy your day. And I wasn't kidding about the Lysol. Spray it now or face the consequences.

even the dog is in on the plot...

my children got together last night before bed. They got together to plot. They are plotting to drive me to the brink of insanity. When I am hovering on the edge, the dog is going to push me over. Oh yeah, even the dog is in on the plot. She's still haboring a bitterness over the fact that I made her get her skanky teeth cleaned last week. Dogs really hang onto grudges over that kind of stuff.
Hannah is doing her part by displaying enough attitude to make me want to pack a bag for her and point her in the direction of the road leading to grandma's house. Because, really? Only grandma would put up with her smart ass mouth without tearing her hair out.
Ryan is being three. Enough said. He wants to wear underwear, but doesn't so much want to sit on the potty. Hmmm. If he pees on my favorite chair, he'll be on his way to grandma's also. Hannah will be happy to have the company on the long walk. If they don't kill each other on the way. They probably will.
Justin is at school, so his part in the plot remains to be seen.
The dog is dancing around the house likes she needs to go out. She's been out 5 times. She goes out and then stands at the door barking. She wants to go out, but not be outside. Hmmm.
And really, I'm just in a bad mood. So pushing me to the edge of the insanity ledge is only a couple of steps. They picked a good day to want to push it. Or a bad day depending on how you look at it.
Is it Friday yet?

to ryan...

someone asked me yesterday if I ever regretted having a 3rd child. Such a bizarre question to me. Like, I really would have answered yes to that? I have never regretted a moment of your life, little man. You bring joy and laughter to me when I am in the darkest of moods. Just yesterday I was cracking smiles all day while you carried around your collection of Polly Pockets dressed in ballgowns and Star Wars figures. Polly & Yoda had a fantastic lightsaber battle and they all ride around in the Rescue Hero space ship. Even in my foul state of mind yesterday, how could I not laugh at that?
You repeat everything that everyone says. It makes Hannah insane, makes me watch my mouth, makes Justin come up with crazy sentences just to see if you'll say it too. And you do.
You always have a chocolate milk mustache. Even when I don't remember giving you chocolate milk. I wipe your face off a dozen times a day, and every time I turn around you are sporting a fu man chu style 'stache. It's rather endearing.
You have your own sense of style. No one can pick out your jammies but you and all clothing must meet your daily approval. You also can wear a Power Ranger costume that is 4 sizes to big and make it look just right. And wear it you do. All the time. Between that and the Dart Vader helmet (also a little too big) we never know which character to expect.
You keep us on our toes.
So, regret? Ummm...no. Are we thankful for you? You bet. Every minute of every day I am thankful that I have you to boss me around.

the thing they forgot to mention...

when they described this house in the real estate literature, it was "a great family house in a wonderful neighborhood". It made it seem like the perfect house for us. No one mentioned that it sits smack in the middle of the school district that NEVER HAS SCHOOL. It may have deterred me a smidge. Today my children are out of school. AGAIN. Why? Because it is foggy. Every other district in the area (and I'm not exaggerating) is on a 2 hr delay. Not us. They didn't even give the delay a shot in hopes that the fog would burn off. Just shut 'er down again. As it stands, Justin and his classmates will be making up 4 days already. I'm guessing before it's over, they'll hit that 5th day and be making up a week at the end of the school year.
UUUUGGGHHHHHH....

celebrating the year of the pig...

in a way only our family can do!

Meet Milo...

Hannah has wanted a guinea pig for months. We decided to take the plunge this weekend. We adopted him from the Humane Society. He is incredibly sweet and even more patient which is a must in this family.

So how is everyone else celebrating the year of the pig?? :)

i don't want to own a teenager....

my kids make me insane. daily. I make no bones about it. Love them, but they drive me insane. After spending 10 days with my brothers, I have a deep appreciation for my little chiclets. Why? Because they can't drive anywhere. And they don't stay out past my bedtime. Ever. My brothers have a very, very long leash. Compared to the very, very short leash that I wore at their age (more a choke collar, than a leash really) their leashes are relatively non-existent. I know, woe is me, I was the oldest child who was never allowed to do anything... blah, blah, blah. But really, I wasn't allowed out past 11 pm until I graduated High School, except for prom nights when I had to be home at midnight one year and 1 am on the other years. That's 11 pm, even on the weekends. Like I said, it was more a choke collar than a leash that I wore. I believe the reason for this was that my parents despised the boyfriend that I clung to during most of High School. With good reason. He was a loser but I didn't see that as clearly as my parents could. Now I do. Thanks for that, mom. Anyway...where was I? Oh, yes...my brothers have a lack of curfew. Meaning, basically, none at all. Not even on school nights. This is insanity to me, but they aren't my children. The problem for me is that, when I am filling in for my parents while they are off at a dog show or on a vacation, I have to deal with this ridiculous-ness. I have to lay awake worrying about them being off in a ditch somewhere until they decide to roll in the front door. Once this past week it was at 12:30 am. On a school night. Or how about 3:30 am? That one was on a weekend, but seriously? 3:30 am???? I whined to my mom about it at one point and she said, "well, they were skiing." OHHHH!!! Then it's OK that I got no sleep last night! Never mind.
And if I whine to my brothers about it, they stare blankly at me. They don't have a concept of curfews and if I start explaining the term to them in the manner I was accustomed to, they are either hearing the Charlie Brown teacher's voice (wah wah wah wah wah) or the old " in my day I had to walk 10 miles uphill each way in 30 ft of snow" speech. They tune out immediately.
So in essence what this was about:
1. teenagers suck.
1. a. they suck even worse when they aren't yours and you have to abide by someone else's rules.
1. b. especially when they are raised by the same people that put you in a choke collar.
2. a drivers license in the hand of a 17 yr old boy is the work of satan.
2. a. no really, when you are lying awake a 2 am wondering where the hell they are, satan is at work
3. cell phones are no good if they are ignored
3. a. cell phones are always ignored when a 17 yr old boy doesn't want to come home yet
3. b. same goes for the 18 yr old boy
4. appreciate your chiclets while they do not have the capability to make you insane in this manner. It's only a matter of time.

havin' me a hiatus....

not much to post, not much time to post it.
My parents are out of town for their big annual New York trip. They used to say it was to go to the Westminster Dog Show, but I have wised up and informed them I have it figured out. They left on Tues. The dog show doesn't start until NEXT MONDAY. They aren't in New York for a dog show, they are New York for a vacation. Whatever. Either way, I am slammed. It has almost been a blessing that the kids have been out of school all week (oh yes. all week.) because I haven't had to do as much back and forth driving. I won't be so lucky next week. It'll be wonderful (and I do mean wonderful) to have the kids back in school, but it means I'll be carpool mama. Between driving them and getting their stuff together, I also have to keep track of my teenage brothers and take care of my mom's collection of dogs. Neither of those last two items are easy or enjoyable. But I signed on for the job.
ANYWAY...the point of all of this chatter is that I won't have time to be bloggin'. I'll return around Fri of next week. I know the 4 people who read this will miss me greatly :) Back soon!

day 3 and counting...

so... the kids are home again. This is spoken through gritted teeth. I am hopeful for a school day tomorrow because the temps are up today and we aren't supposed to be blasted with snow again.
I am very hopeful. Because, really, I don't think I can scrap together enough Weight Watcher points to drink the tumbler full of Bailey's and cream that is my desire today. God help me if I have to take another day of bored kids.

school's out AGAIN...

mama's got nothing. I pulled out all the stops yesterday.

school's out. go build something....

it is so cold, they cancelled school today. I don't have a memory of that happening in my childhood. Probably it did, but I only remember school being called because of snow. There isn't all that much snow, but it is cold. Scratch that. Not just cold. It is bitter, freeze the ears right off of your head, curse mother nature, FUH-REEZING out. Of course Justin wants to go out and play. I'm having to explain the finer points of frost bite to him to make him understand why it isn't so much a good idea. To keep him in the house and happy I had to get creative. I am praising the creators of the Cranium company today. I got the kids the Super Fort for Christmas. They had one big giant structure built for about a week after Christmas until I got tired of looking at it and took it all down. They screamed at me and told me how mean I was. But I can take it, I hear all of that daily. I thought to myself what a good idea it would be to put it up for awhile and pull it out on a day just such as today. And again, I have stunned myself with my own brilliance. I pulled it out an hour ago and all 3 children have been busy creating some type of structure since then. And no one is dead yet. In fact I haven't even heard an argument. Anyone with more than one child, knows that this is a miracle. I heart the Super Fort.

why is it?

so, I am giddy over a few things right now. And I don't really know why. They don't much directly affect me, but I am regardless, excited over them.
1) My husband's birthday present is en-route from Fed-Ex and should be here tomorrow. It is something so stupid, I know he will love it. At least I hope so or it will be the let-down of the decade for me. I don't know how I will wait 10 more days to give it to him.
2) Jen's family is leaving for Disney in the next few days. I told you these didn't mostly affect me. Her kids don't know about it and I just can't wait to hear their reactions. I saw a Disney commercial the other day and got almost teary with excitement. Did I mention this is someone else's family entirely? Why am I so excited? Again, no idea.
3) I made an excellent dinner last night that had everyone licking their plates clean. I felt a little Martha-ish about it.

Just had to share. That, or I got nothing else. You pick.

back to reality...

I had the most wonderful-est weekend. Carol was flown up to the frozen tundra that is the state of Ohio for the weekend. This is no small feat. She is a South Carolinian who is originally from Florida. Did you catch the earlier bit about the frozen tundra that is Ohio?? Needless to say, while shopping, I was at that stage where you just give up and leave your coat in the car because it's too damn hot to wear it in the store and too bulky to carry it and shop. Carol on the other hand, had my heavy coat with the zipout fleece liner (zipped in), gloves, scarf, headband over her ears...in the store. Girlfriend was not easily adjusted to the tundra. But did we have fun?? Oh but of course we did!!! We drank wine that was DIVINE. Made the world's greatest margaritas (and yes, I am the authority). Worked on scrapbooks and crafty projects. ate. shopped. ate. shopped. ate. ate. ate. shopped. It was a wonderful weekend. As always, I was delirious with sadness when I dropped her off at the airport.
I think she was thrilled with the weekend also. She was begging to see snow- because being from the South, she is stupid like that :) She not only saw snow, she saw it snow so hard it was blowing sideways-this was amazing to her. We drove through blowing snow that cause white-out conditions. All the things that make southerners twitch, while us northerners barely notice. So, she got the snow she asked for and all of the above mentioned fun-ness. What more can you ask for??
Oh and P.S. I had alcohol IN FRONT OF MY KIDS. Eat your heart out Dr. Janet Taylor.

cocktails and kids....

I don't mix them up for my kids, but I know they appreciate seeing me mix them sometimes. They've never said it out loud, but I think that when I'm in a particularly foul state of mind they must be happy when they see mama's blue shaker come out for the 4 o'clock cocktail. Is that horrible? I just don't think it is. I'm not an alcoholic. Does me saying that mean I am??? I don't NEED a drink to get through the day, but sometimes it sure does help me get through that black tunnel that is the 4-6 p.m. time slot (sometimes 6:30 and WOW does that 1/2 hr make a difference!).
Why am I talking about this??? Because someone I know was on the Today Show talking about the same subject this morning. It was super cool to see an old friend on TV. And it was funny to see her try to make a point about it being OK to drink at a playgroup with your kids, while a PhD or some such person tried to argue it against her. Because, really what are we talking about here? Someone who gets sloshed and gets in her minivan with the kids? No. More like someone who knows their limits and can have a drink with friends in the afternoon. What's the big deal? At one point the woman argued that it wasn't responsible parenting to drink in front of our children. But isn't it? Isn't it good to show them that it's OK when and ADULT has a drink and doesn't get total smashed everytime they start drinking.
Whatever....I don't want to start an arguement. It was pretty cool to see someone I knew, chatting it up with Meredith this morning.
Here's the link if you care to watch...
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16818362/