free week...

so, summer is winding down. In less than 2 weeks the monkeys will return to school. Where-o-where has my summer gone? It's gone to kid's camps and working. I signed the kids up for a lot of camps and workshops this summer and I don't know if I'll do that many again. It has kept them busy and that was the plan, but maybe a little too busy. We haven't had NEAR enough time to just veg out. And isn't that what summer is all about? This is the first week that I don't have to take any kids to camp or have to work a bunch of hours. It feels blissful!
Aside from a crazy camp schedule and shuttling them to and from their various activities, I have been learning slowly how to be a working parent. It ain't easy. I have been extended an offer to continue on as director of the preschool. Once we get a few contract things ironed out, it's a go. And that is exciting and scary as all get out. I love the job and all of the people that I work with, but between that and a full time college schedule, I worry that my kids and family will suffer. For the first time ever I will require a babysitter. Only for a few hours every afternoon for Ryan, but that is a huge leap for me. I am blessed to have a friend whom I have known since childhood, who also has a son Ryan's age who is willing to take him on. She already babysits one other little girl (also Ryan's age) and her son goes to preschool with Ryan. So it seems to be the perfect situation. It's just hard to let go. I have always been there for my kids when they are picked up from school. Now 3 days a week, I'll be on campus in the middle of a class when he gets done and instead of running out of his classroom into my arms, he'll walk out to someone else. I know in the long run it will be good for them to see what I am going through to further my education and how important it is to me, but I don't ever want them to feel like I am sacrificing them or our family for something. Even if it is something that will make our family better in the long run.
I have pondered holding off and going back to school once Ryan goes off to 1st grade but I figure at that point, I'll almost be done with college all together. Plus if our district goes into a split session like they are talking about doing, I'll run into a whole new set of scheduling obstacles then too. No...now is the time. The doors are open for me and I won't shut them again. It is just painful. Almost physically so, to shift our family around and try to make this all work out. But it will work out. It always does. I may be a lunatic for the next couple of years, but it will work out.